Bodie’s Guide to the San Ysidro Ranch

July 2, 2015

Ah the fabled San Ysidro Ranch – voted America’s #1 Hotel by Forbes so naturally they would chose America’s #1 Dog to model for the Pet Welcome Letter…. Yes! That’s Bodie doing some extreme posing – but how did he get there?

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Flashback to the research phase of my latest novel: I needed an exclusive hideaway, somewhere a Hollywood A-lister could steal away to and be with her secret husband. Searching for properties within a two hour radius of Los Angeles, I discovered the San Ysidro Ranch with its entrancing romantic history:

Vivien Leigh married Laurence Olivier here, President Kennedy and First Lady Jackie chose this as their honeymoon hideaway, John Huston wrote The African Queen during his three-month stay and it’s even Oprah-endorsed – she lives up the road and is a regular at the hotel’s Plow & Angel cellar restaurant. (The Ranch Macaroni & Cheese is spoken of with rapturous awe.)

The novel was also to feature a cameo from Bodie (he’s the A-lister’s pup!) so we needed somewhere pet-friendly and it just so happens this idyllic Santa Barbara property offers pet massages, a dedicated dog menu, 17 miles of trails and a complimentary Bow Wow Beanie. (The hotel owner is Ty Warner, creator of Beanie Babies.) Having only adopted Bodie a few weeks prior, this would be the very first hotel we would stay in together – start as you mean to go on!

ARRIVAL: As we turn up the long driveway, bordered with olive trees and brimming with Spanish lavender, I experience a butterfly-flutter of anticipation. The gatekeeper motions us through and our tyres grind at the golden grit as we approach the main building, a white storybook cottage vivacious with cerise bougainvillea.

SYR Main Building

The adjacent rose gardens have a distinctly English feel but the backdrop is pure California with the sun-steeped Santa Ynez mountains and cobalt blue sky. Bodie whines in rapture, eager to press his undulating nose up against the beauty.

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CHECK-IN: Already Bodie is getting the celebrity treatment, presented with a silver bowl of water and gulping it down like its Happy Hour, then enjoying a multitude of treats before signing in the special Privileged Pet Guestbook. We have the key to our cottage but the grounds entice us…. The sun is mellowing and it feels as though we’re stepping into the pages of a Flower Fairy book as we stroll past cottages with names like Fig, Tangerine, Oak and Willow, all lovingly entwined with foliage.

This property has such a special feel to it I can’t help but wonder if we’re traversing some kind of ley line! For me the feeling can be summed up as tranquillity meets radiance and wonder – Bodie’s expression here says it all:

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DOG-WALKING TRAILS To get to the trails we lean in and climb a hill set with expansive residential homes, the first of which is marked Very Private Property. As opposed to Moderately Private? I wonder. Talk about keeping up with the Joneses! I expect the next house to be marked, ‘Even More Private’ and then the one after ‘The Most Private of All.’

As we walk on I run my hands along the roadside lavender bushes and crush a few purple buds in my hand, inhaling the soothing scent. I offer my palms to Bodie but he is more interested in taking in the priceless view – the distant ocean the palest wash against a hazy sky. Minutes later we find ourselves engulfed in forest, weaving around peeling eucalyptus trees, stepping over mossy logs, inspecting bristles of thistles and feathery ferns. Bodie kicks up a flurry of fallen leaves. This is real deal dog territory, I feel like I should be wearing tweed knickerbockers and marking each step with a knotty walking stick.

‘Isn’t this idyllic?’ I pause to marvel at the leaf-dappled light, the glossy trickle of the creek beside us, the clarity of the cool water spilling over the rocks. So many times I’ve been somewhere beautiful and wished I was sharing it with someone and now I am. Someone who is loving every second – darting this way and that, sniffing busily, fascinatedly. He’s like a street kid in nature for the first time, curiosity driving him on to new discoveries. And then we reach a clearing and the sun infuses Bodie’s fur with a golden aura. My angel.

OUR DOG-FRIENDLY COTTAGE ‘I can’t believe it!’ I gasp as we ascend the steps to the front deck of our cottage – there beside the front door is a wooden sign branded with two words JONES and BODIE.

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It’s only on closer inspection that I realise the sign is made up of individual letters. So clever. Just slot them in. What a lovely welcoming touch – it really feels like this is our place now. And what a place it is.

You know how rich people often have eccentric touches to their exquisite taste? So you’ll have the luxuriously upholstered window seat and the antique chandelier then you’ll notice a little hand-painted porcelain pig sleeping on a tasseled pillow or a carved rabbit fruit bowl? That’s how it is here – classic high end furnishings mixed with ‘trinkets from my travels’, as if this were a real home, right down to the worn-to-softness rug set hearthside.

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There is a bottle of Evian water assigned to fill one side of Bodie’s bone-shaped dog bowl (giving new meaning to the term bone china). His treats come in a little gauzy bag embossed with black velvet paw prints and his dog bed looks so plush it makes me want to curl up and take a nap.

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Bodie’s Bow Wow Beanie gift is Weenie The Dog – he clamps down on it, gives a little prance-dance of joy and brings it along as we explore the bathroom – easily long enough to play a game of fetch, especially if you open out the far door onto the patio. This may be the prettiest bathroom I’ve ever seen – all white wood wainscoting, cinnamon-colored beams and leafy sunlight gleaming through the picture-book windows.

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I can almost envision Bodie a-froth with bubbles in the clawfoot tub…

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The silky-smooth tiles on the floor even heat up – perhaps we’ll lie down on it later, like some interior design version of a hot stone treatment.

Outside we marvel at the patio’s private hot tub, outdoor shower (replete with Bulgari cleansing products) and walls tumbling with jasmine… I’ve never seen Bodie’s eyes look so bright. I watch him as he listens to the birds – every time they chirrup or coo his ears prick up and his nose tilts skyward. Just delightful.

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DOG MASSAGE: Masseuse Glenys is an instantly-likeable South African woman in her sixties dressed head to toe in white with a mop of tousled grey hair, pink cheeks and a tea & scones hug. She places a towel on the patio sunlounger and before I can ruefully inform her that Bodie is unlikely to hop up there or stay he does just that.

I watch in amazement as he submits to her touch. He’s typically such a fidget-bottom, all jumpy and wriggly but within minutes he enters a deep meditative mode. He’s on his back now, lids heavy, head lolling to the side as she works his hips…

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I lean close and whisper: ‘I have to ask – have you ever been bitten?’

‘Never. All breeds love to be massaged.’

She moves on to Bodie’s middle-back and he responds with some kind of ‘upward dog’ pose – front paws stretched out, chest raised, head all the way back so that his ears are nearly touching his shoulders, all the while his eyes fixed on a cooing Glenys. This is the snap that enchanted the San Ysidro Ranch and earned Bodie a place on the Pet Welcome letter!

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‘That was wonderful,’ Glenys sighs as she concludes his half hour session. ‘He’s a very special dog.’

‘I bet you say that to all the dog-owners!’ I smile.

‘Really, the pleasure was mine.’

Both Bodie and I are smitten with Glenys and sorry to see her leave.

‘So now what?’ Bodie looks up at me.

‘Now we dine…’

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DOGGIE DINING: One of the great treats of staying in a hotel is ordering room service – or in this case In-Cottage Dining – and now Bodie can get in on the act with his freshly-cooked order of Chicken & Rice. (I choose Steak Diane and a glass of opulent red wine.)

We eat fireside – one flip of a switch sends bright yellow flames reaching up the faux-blackened chimney. While I savour every flavoursome morsel Bodie inhales his dish in two get-every-last-fleck minutes.

Afterwards he joins me on the tapestry-textured sofa. I relish the increasing weight upon my chest as he surrenders to a full-bellied sleep.

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As my left hand smoothes his fur, my right holds a small anthology of dog poetry – Doggerel by Carmela Ciuraru. It includes works from such luminaries as William Wordsworth, Elizabeth Barrett Browning and Rudyard Kipling. And it was placed within arm’s reach of me on the sofa. I don’t know the last time I paused to read something purely for pleasure. It feels so calming to do so, especially in this setting.

My favourite verse is from Siegfried Sassoon’s Man and Dog.

What share we most – we two together?

Smells, and an awareness of the weather.

What is it makes us more than dust?

My trust in him, in me his trust.

I set down the book and look back at the fire, feeling so safe and cosy. In the next room a vast canopied bed with a neverending whiteness of the sheets awaits. I have the feeling we’re going to sleep well tonight…

NOTE: Excerpts from BODIE ON THE ROAD (the book) were woven into this review!

SAN YSIDRO RANCH WEBSITE: http://www.sanysidroranch.com

SAN YSIDRO RANCH ADDRESS: 900 San Ysidro Lane, Santa Barbara, CA 93108

PHONE: 805.565.1700

PET MASSAGE: $75 for half an hour

PET FEE: $100 one-time cleaning fee per pet.

RESTRICTIONS: Dogs are only permitted in the freestanding cottages at the SYR.

NOTE: Bodie was a guest of the San Ysidro Ranch but our review is heartfelt!

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